Saturday, November 22, 2003
I have an almost overwhelming urge to go to the airport and buy a ticket (well, two tickets) on the first flight far, far away. But it's hard to get away from yourself.
There's nothing to say about yesterday that's worth saying. Or reading. Instead, I'll mention how Spooky and I tried to sit through Peter Benchley's Creature on Sci-Fi night before last. It was actually scripted by Farscape creator Rockne S. O'Bannon. Which just goes to show that sometimes we all screw up. This ridiculous turkey was stretched out over a four-hour mini-series! Easily, it all could have been crammed into 45 minutes. Stan Wintson's monster was cool, of course, but it couldn't come close to redeeming the bad script, wooden acting, indifferent direction, and complete lack of anything resembling cinematography (not to mention the fact that the source material was that awful Benchley novel). Finally, we gave up, three-quarters of the way through, and watched a couple of eps of Farscape (3:10, "Relativity" and 3:11, "Incubator"). Then, last night, as though inspired by the cheese of Creature, Spooky and I wound up at Blockbuster, in search of bad sci-fi. We picked up Alien Hunter (with James Spader) and Deep Shock (with David Keith). Alien Hunter disappointed us by not sucking, even though it ripped off everything from The Thing (both versions) to Stargate (and who would want to rip off Stargate?). Fortunately, Deep Shock lived down to our expectations (I actually dozed off twice) and was bad just about every way a film about intelligent electric eels trying to melt the ice caps by opening deep sea vents could possibly suck. The eels in question have to be one of the worst examples of creature design in the history of direct-to-video, coming off as smiling CGI renderings of "Puff, the Magic Dragon." This movie is more fun than hurting yourself with a grapefruit spoon. I stand by my word.
Happy birthday to Kat, Shannon, and Jean-Paul, Floridians one and all.
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